we really talked a lot last episode, sorry 'bout that.]
#37 "Faeries and Werewolves and Yak's- oh my!" or
"A voyage around Yakky" -By Ally
will now delve briefly into the psyche of everyone's favourite semi-werewolf
being and teen bloke-type Yakky.
"Oh no," thought Yakky inspecting his arm, "my arm is all
tingly and I have a strange urge never to wash it again. Being not half
as stupid as they all think, I've got a pretty good idea of what that
Dammit! Now Sprout is in my brain! Must- stop- thinking- Beansprout,
Beansprout, Beansprout, Dammit and double dammit! This is very weird-
hey what the folk's going on with that sword? Oh My God BEANSPROUT!!!"
Yakky leapt forwards in an attempt to knock the sword from her hands,
but as always, it was too late. [Unless of course
it's comic to have him leaping at her or falling on her or otherwise making
contact which he asserts is unwanted] [You really read way too much into this
was enveloped in a bright blue sphere which Yakky bounced off of with
an electrical shock and landed several feet away.
"DAH!" Yakky shouted as he stood up and ran at the barrier again,
with similar results. "Beansprout!!!"
"Isn't it cute?" whispered Flibbage to J, who smirked.
"Shut up! I DON'T fancy Beansprout, I'm just concerned for her safety!"
"Nobody said you did," pointed out J, "except possibly-
"Shut up! TASTE MY CLAWS EVIL BARRIER!!!"
"I don't think it looks very evil." J ventured.
Flibbage started to hum the overture from the lion king, [could
she say 'Pan out pan out pan out CUT
TO GRAPHIC!!!' at some point?][No,
I used that line in series 6.]
not evil is it?" J asked
"Do you think we should tell Yakky to stop?"
"Nah, it's too amusing."
* * *
Meanwhile Beansprout's mind had been transported to a strange tellytubby-esque
fantasy land with cheerful flowers and happy bluebirds.
"What the Folk?" said she, as she was accustomed.
"Greetings Beansprout," said an otherworldly voice. Beansprout
turned to see a tall and unusually attractive young man, except he had
"Who the Folk are you?" she demanded crossly.
"I am Mervyn, spirit of the Thing for the Opening of Blah etc."
"And I'm here because
"Because you're holding it, and only you can access its vast magical
potential. Geez, didn't you realise the Sword was the Thing? I thought
you were supposed to be intelligent."
"I have a lot on my mind!"
"What? Oh, that werewolf boy you fancy?"
"Yeah, yeah," said Mervyn dismissively, "anyway. I thought
I'd impart some indispensable advice unto you to aid in thy quest, um
"Look both ways before crossing the road, never mix your drinks,
never eat anything you can't remember buying and always wear matching
underwear, because what would people think if you got hit by a bus?"
"How's that supposed to help me?"
"Trust me, it will," said Mervyn sagely as the scene began to
fade. "Oh, and one other thing-" he began as the image disappeared.
[Hey! We can return to that and have him giving her the important advice!][
No shut up! His whole point in life is that he's utterly useless as the
foolish fools will find out in series 7, stop ruining it!]
"RARGH!" Yakky yelled and tried to stop in mid-leap, which
only resulted in him landing on her. [Told you!
Comic!] There was an awkward moment, broken only when Flibbage
descended into a giggling fit.
"AAAA!!!" Beansprout shrieked. Yakky also said "AAAA!!!"
in a more masculine way, and they scrambled about as far away from each
other as was possible.
"Well," said J, "if you two are quite finished-"
"-would you mind telling us what just happened?"
Beansprout shivered. "Let's find somewhere warm first. I'm cold."
"Pffff there's a ha ha ha ha a Pïzzä Høt hee hee
hee nearby ha ha ha ha
"Good then, lets go," Beansprout said walking away very quickly
with Flibbage, hissing "Shut up, shut up!!!"
"Okay?" J asked Yakky, who was very red.
"Fine, fine. Let's go." [that's the
nicest thing they've said to each other in EPISODES]
And so our intrepid and hormonal quartet went off in search of Pïzzä