#39 "The Happy, Happy, la, la, la, la, yay edition!"
Or "The return of the children of the parents of Red, Barry, Cabbage,
The Elf and Oddball." By Alice.
this episode were sketches of Flibbage playing the ukulele, J dancing
with a cane and top hat, Yakky and Beansprout singing, Cabbage and the
Elf discussing manga over mugs of posh hot chocolate and Red and Barry
'going to look for their shoes', I stress, this girl got infected with
cheesiness][Oi! I forgot the bloody anniversary, I preceeded the first kiss with 'Let's get
it over with, then', and I lured him up hills
and I'm going to stop
][ when going out with boys
][How is it cheesy when it's taking the piss out of cheesy? ][Oh
you were not taking the piss
the awkward silence got longer and longer, Beansprout and Yakky were thinking
along the same lines;
Yakky; We've been sitting here rather a long time, what am I gonna say?
Where are those two? Unless they've run off somewhere together- euw! No
wait- maybe they've left US here together on purpose
you he was dumb ][at what point did I disagree?]
Beansprout; Curse you Flibbage, you conniving elf, this is really embarrassing!
I don't fancy Yakky! I DON'T! This is so unfair
Luckily there was a handy diversion from the silence as the door flew
open and a group of people who were old enough to know better walked in
laughing raucously and discussing Big Brother.
"And I reckon, they'll kill Jade, then eat her as part of the next
said before she noticed Beansprout frantically trying to hide under the
table. "Hi honey! Look, I have a new boyfriend!" she pointed
at the guy she was draped over. [I would like
to add a footnote or an aside stating that Red was very ill at the time][
Hehehe Red loves Barry! Red loves Barry!]
"Mum," said Beansprout wrinkling her nose, "That's my dad,
I've already met him."
"Yeesh, there's the rest of them," said Cabbage as J and Flibbage
wandered back over, Flibbage making 'Oh God, not our embarrassing parents
in the real world!' expressions at Beansprout, "I dunno, walk into
a random Pïzzä Høt and you find your children cramping
your style. Eurgh, I can feel my allergies kicking in already."
"Mum, why is that Pizza Elf still hanging around?" Flibbage
asked her mother distastefully.
"Well he seems to have fallen in love with me, which is frankly an
easy thing to do, so I'm letting him hang around. He's really quite clever."
"So why aren't you guys in the faerie realm, seeing as I know how
you hate the real world
"Well I thought it was worth braving hayfever and sunburn to go and
pick strawberries and- DO YOU MIND? OH FOR GOD'S SAKE GET A ROOM!"
She yelled at Red and Barry [Red was in fact
so ill she was close to death] before continuing," As
I was saying, and we all like pizza so we thought we'd find somewhere
where you lot weren't, but then you were so our plan backfired."
"Hi Fred," said the last member of the party to Yakky, in Nepalese.
"Hi Oddball," he answered.
"Are you eating your head?"
"No, that's pepperoni."
"Actually, it's quite good you're here", said Red, sitting at
the table in between Yakky and Beansprout [To
get away from Barry, who was exploiting her illness ] "I've been meaning to give you two a talk
on the facts of narrative." [Ho ho ho Alice
Nuttall, YOU wrote this
Red looked over to the two faeries to make sure they weren't listening
to tell her to shut up, then started talking in an undertone, "You
see, it's quite blatant that you two fancy each other, but I think if
you ever get together then your whole lives will become boring and pointless."
"Mum. Go away, you are embarrassing, wrong and confusing
Red continued oblivious, "You see all of the humour is based around
you secretly liking each other but not being able to admit it, and well
if you did get together, lets face it, a happy ending would come along
and spoil everything pretty damn quick. Oh, unless one of you dies-"
"RED!" Cabbage roared, who had been dancing a small random dance
for no apparent reason, but had just realized what Beansprout's mother
was up to.
"You could sleep with each other I suppose, as long as you both really
regretted it and one of you ran away for a while-" Red added before
anyone could shut her up.
"MUM!!!" [why isn't Yakky embarrassed?][
I'd say he was cowering in silence
"Well it's true!!!" Red screamed as Cabbage got her in a headlock.
"So now what?" J asked.
"Come on lets get out of here. Stupid, skanky parents!" raged
Beansprout as she stormed towards the door. The others wisely followed,
Yakky sulking, Flibbage thoughtful and J bemused, leaving the five adults
throwing olives at each other. Due to their preoccupations, none of them
noticed the big pit outside the door until they'd all fallen into it an