#54 "Smoke and Mirrors"
in my opinion, there should have been a slapping of high fives before
everyone set off, so here's my version of events.]
"So that's the plan?" asked Yakky.
"Indeedy." Giggled Flibbage, recovering from her crazed laughter.
"Okay, lets split up," he replied, and everyone put their hands
into the circle and yelled 'GO TEAM!'
Oh and also
"Be careful out there." Said Yakky to Beansprout, and kissed
her. (Cue dramatic music)
" said Flibbage and J in unison.
[Right, now I've finished tampering with history and stuffing in the cheese],
back to the cliff hanger.
"Argh!" what the Folk?!" Quoth our slightly perturbed heroine,
wondering if it was all done with mirrors, and hastily dodging out of
the way in case it wasn't. The sword left a nasty looking swathe of carnage
in the floor tiles, so she was convinced.
"I expect you were wondering if all this was done with mirrors,"
chuckled evil Beansprout as real Beansprout frantically blocked her feints
with the sword.
"Eep!" Yelped Beansprout as one passed dangerously close to
her neck, slicing off one of her pigtails, "Argh! My hair!"
"I am in fact a clone, just like the one your mind possesses, but
with the original GM E.V.I.L genes!"
"Did I ask?? Die clone bitch!" Beansprout yelled launching forward
with the sword. E-Sprout, of course easily sidestepped and sliced off
the other pigtail in the process.
Beansprout was about to leap into another foolish and futile attack, that
might have eventually resulted in her death when the doors opened and
the two clones stopped short as;
"Sprout! Flibbage said I'd better follow you, because you might need
some help and I was under her feet and
oh crap." Said Yakky.
"She's an evil clone!" Yelled both Beansprouts pointing at each
"Argh! One of you is evil? I thought it was just another clone."
"For Folk's sake Yakky! Can't you tell us apart?" growled Beansprout,
"She's evil! Just look at her!"
"Oh come on Yakky," said E-Sprout, "That thing doesn't
even have the right haircut."
"Oh yeah!" said Yakky suspiciously, "You don't. I think
you're the evil one, your hair looks pretty evil."
At this point Beansprout really lost her temper. "YAKKY YOU DUMB
PIECE OF SHIT! CAN'T YOU TELL THE DIFFERENCE BETWEEN YOUR OWN GIRLFRIEND
AND AN EVIL CLONE? YOU ARE SO UNBELIEVABLE! ARGH!"
E-Sprout laughed. "Me and him? A couple? Pfah! Don't make me laugh.
As if that'd ever happen. You are such an evil clone."
"Wargh!" said Yakky, realizing his mistake and ran over to hide
behind Beansprout, who scowled at him.
"Huh?" said the confused E-Sprout.
"Hah! That's what you get for not researching future events in my
clone! And with that established,"
she added grabbing Yakky's arm, "RUN AWAAAAAAY!!!"
And so they did, leaving E-Sprout standing in the throne room, saying,
"Euw! Euw! Us a couple? Gross! Ptechk! Ptechk!"
* * *
"Waah! My beautifully ironic pigtails are gone!" wailed Beansprout as they wandered into the palace's labyrinth
of dark and gothic secret passages.
"Nah, you look lovely." Said Yakky assuming the typical male
bravado pose of walking along with his hands behind his head.
"I haven't forgiven you yet. You said I looked evil."
"Maybe I was lying to make you yell at me so that E-Sprout would
reveal herself to be a fraud." He said clasping her around the waist
in an effort to be endearing.
"You weren't though, were you?"
"No. But it's the thought that counts
At this point they came across a locked door.
"Stand back a second. I'm gonna trash this door, because I'm in a
bad mood now. That stupid clone bitch." Beansprout said raising the
sword. Yakky obediently stepped back. The sword flashed in blue lines
through the air and the door was reduced to a small pile of splinters.
As the gloom faded back in Yakky stepped forwards from the shadows.
"Come on then, I'm sure we'll end up somewhere useful in the end.
We usually do." Said Beansprout grabbing him by the arm again as
she strode forward through the doorway.
A little further back; "MMPF!!!" Yelled the real Yakky as someone
shoved a gag into his mouth.
"Did you hear something?" said Beansprout lifting the sword.
"Not a thing." Said E-Yakky, putting an arm around her shoulders
as they walked further into the dark.
OH NO READERS, WILL OUR HEROINE REALIZE THAT HER BOYFRIEND HAS BEEN
REPLACED BY AN EVIL (AND PRESUMABLY BETTER INFORMED) CLONE BEFORE IT'S
WHERE IS FLIBBAGE?
WHERE IS BARRY?
WHAT PART DOES J HAVE IN THE PLANS?
FIND OUT NEXT TIME IN INUBUYAKASHA!