Volume 1: a Foolish Faerietale
Episode #49 "The Time and Space of That Old Dude with the 'Tache (But far less logical)"
By Ally

"FOLK! FOLK! FOLK!" Beansprout screamed, launching herself repeatedly at the door of the hostage cell. This had little effect other than to bruise her slightly. The NGSPIB had confiscated the Sword of Slayskull and the Noisy Cricket, so without Flibbage's planning ability or magic, they were pretty much screwed.
In the corner, Yakky and J were trying to revive Flibbage.
"Coffee granules?" suggested Yakky.
"Don't be stupid, man!"
"Speed?"
"We don't have any of that either!"
"Is she even alive?"
"I can't tell, she's too little and you're distracting me!"
Yakky paused for thought. "Beansprout, stop being futile and masochistic, we need your brain! How can we revive tiny things?"
"20V of electricity, everyone knows that, foolish men!" she replied, wandering over in a slight daze. "This is so gonna folk up the past. Flibbage and J have been kidnapped twice, and Yakky and I have been kidnapped -but also not."
"It does explain why they didn't look for us very hard the first time," put in Yakky. J was busy looking around for anything that could supply exactly 20V of electricity. The cell seemed to have previously been some kind of storage office, and was full of broken and dismantled pieces of machinery. Unfortunately, none of it seemed suitable for weaponry.
"However, don't worry about it, until we've revived Flib, she's kinda the priority right now." Yakky said putting an arm around Beansprout's shoulder.
"Or the capture problem," Beansprout agreed leaning her head on his shoulder.
A short while later J emerged from the pile of rubbish brandishing a dangerously sparking vibrating sheep [I tried to think of something PG and amusing, but I couldn't, so live with it].
"Guys, do you think this would work?- Oh for God's sake, get a room or something…"
"Sorry."
"Sorry J. Hmm- that should work, although what the NGSPIB were using it for doesn't bear thinking about." Beansprout commented, taking the sheep and holding it above Flibbage. "Now what we need is a particularly large-OW!!!"
A particularly large shock leapt from the sheep into Flibbage shocking Beansprout in the process.
"FOLK!" cried Flibbage in alarm and sat up abruptly. Her hair crackled with sparks.
"Ow, ow, ow-ow!!!" Beansprout yelped, clutching her hand.
"Wicked!" said Yakky, "Glad you're okay Flib."
"Okay? OKAY!? You call THIS okay!?"
"Yeah, well I know we got ourselves captured by the NGSPIB which probably isn't good for the space-time situation but-"
"NO YOU FOOL! MY HAIR!!! Look at my HAIR DAMMIT!!!"
J filled her in on the details of their predicament whilst Yakky decided it was his moral duty to comfort his girlfriend over the electrocuted hand thing.
"Hmm, this is indeed a pickle WILL YOU TWO PLEASE STOP THAT?!"
"Sorry."
"Sorry Flib."
"Now how are we going to get out of this mess you've gotten us into?"
"We were kind of hoping you'd have a plan," J said hesitantly.
"Why do I always have to think of the plan? Are you stupid? No! I'm completely knackered, I can't even use any magic I'm so tired."
"Bugger."

* * *

Henchman 2 nudged Henchman 26 [only the special NGSPIB agents get letters you know]. "When do you think those kids'll be along then?"
"I don't." Henchman 26 said quickly.
"Oh come on, they always turn up just in time to foil the Boss's plans," Henchman 2 continued oblivious to his friends pointed saluting. "They're a bit late come to think of it."
"They won't be coming because THE BOSS'S plan was great," Henchman 26 said, frantically winking and kicking Henchman 2 in the shins.
"Ow! What was that for, you Idiot! Anyway his plans always suck and- oh God he's standing right behind me isn't he?"
"Uh yeah."
Before Henchman 2 could begin to babble an apology, Mr. NGSPIB had shot him in the back of the head.
"Moose," muttered the enigmatic villain, kicking the corpse out of his way. "And as for you…" he added, turning to Henchman 26 who whimpered and shut his eyes, "…did you really like my plan?"
"Yes sir! It's a great plan sir!"
"Yay! Hail! Hail!" Mr. NGSPIB made strange bowing motions towards the confused Henchman.
"What is the plan…?" asked Henchman 26, nervously.
"Well seeing as you liked it so much, I'll tell you," Mr. NGSPIB answered illogically. "You see, years ago, before I had risen to the eminent position I hold within the NGSPIB now, I was working in Nepal, when one day we caught the same people twice, as can happen in our line of work. What stuck in my mind was that they were… well let's just say I had personal ties with these kids. So recently, when I formulated my excellent plan to capture Faerie, I saw how I could use the past to help me in my efforts." Mr. NGSPIB led the perturbed Henchman along the refurbished shiny steel passages of the Temple of Choom. "During the time I spent on reconnaissance in Faerie, I studied all I could about time-hop spells, and calculated my portal so that they'd have to go back past the time in question. I then travelled back in time and planted a leeching device [ooh gadgets, very spy…] in the guise of a dangerously sparking vibrating sheep where I knew those pesky kids would find it. The conventions state that Beansprout would be the one to revive Flibbage with it, immediately leeching away Flibbage's magic and Beansprout's ability to wield magical weapons. These two factors, under our control give us an edge in the war for Faerie.
"So we can infiltrate the Kingdom?" Henchman 26 said, enjoying his literary promotion to sceptical confidante. "Surely the Queen and Red can tell the difference between their beloved daughters and NGSPIB agents, even if they do have sarcastic and magical powers."
"Yes," said Mr. NGSPIB opening a door, with a strange, incredibly smug smile on his face. "Yes they would. You're absolutely right."
Henchman 26 looked at the contents of the room, and did a double take.
"Jesus Christ!" he breathed in awe.

* * *

Once upon a time in a cell, our heroes were sitting around looking bored and at a loss and in Flibbage's case, drained.
"I feel really odd," she whined again.
"WE KNOW!"
Beansprout was staring quizzically at a shard of metal from the junk heap. She'd been staring at it for quite some time.
"I knew it!" she said suddenly.
"What?"
"This is Hydrothroxymoxypoxy alloy!"
The others looked at her blankly.
"It's a fragment of the hull from Deepwater YAK," Beansprout explained wearily.
"Oh of course!"
"I knew that!"
"Me too!"
"There are bits of it all over the room," our heroine added, picking over the junk piles. "They must have found the wreck, they've taken it apart pretty thoroughly."
"But hang on, it shouldn't even be here yet," Yakky said. "You and I crash it into a mountain on the way to rescuing these two from here, just before Ynri summoned us."
"Yeah, that was your explanation…" sniggered Flibbage.
"This must be… like a dumping ground for all NGSPIB rubbish from all times." Beansprout mused, still sorting through rubbish, "I mean, look here, there's a picture of us four in Disneyland, and we haven't been there yet."
"Wow!" said J
"Disneyland man! Yeah!" Whooped Yakky and slapped him a high-five.
"Returning to the POINT, why would the NGSPIB take the ship to pieces? I mean, they built it," mused Flibbage.
"Folk knows," Beansprout replied, "They must have been looking for something…"

* * *

In the Faerie Realm, Cabbage and red were in the garden, drunk as ever.
"What I'm Shaying," Cabbage slurred, "Ish that nothin' can feel thish forebodey and not be worth even a lil' tiny bit of worry."
Red flapped her hands around dismissively and shook her head. "You worry too much. Besides, we had a happy turnip."
"Ending."
"Thass the one. An'… an'… that means we don' hafta worry 'bout shit 'til the sequel. An' the sequel's always piss-easy an' unoriginal."
"I schtill reckon… oh wait here come the kids…" said Cabbage simultaneously standing up and falling over.
Beansprout, Flibbage Yakky and J had entered the garden, Beansprout nonchalantly carrying the Sword of Slayskull; J the Noisy Cricket and Flibbage was spangly beyond all belief with magic.
Cabbage and Red squinted at them. Even in a drunken state something didn't seem quite right, but they knew their daughters when they saw them.
"Hi Sprout." Red said cheerily, expecting to be reprimanded for her drunkenness. She was shocked to have Beansprout return her bright smile. "Are you Okay Sprout? You look- sort of pale…"
"I'm fine Mum," smiled Beansprout.
Cabbage finally hauled herself to her feet, "Why y'all back sho soon? Anything wrong? Because I had thish-"
Beansprout shook her head firmly. "Everything's fine," she answered, looking around the garden, taking in the warmth and colour, "It's just good to be back here," she said with a smirk.

DUM DUM DUUUM!!!
AGAIN I ASK YOU WHO IS MR. NGSPIB?
IF YOU DON'T KNOW YET, YOU'RE PROBABLY A RETARD,
DON'T WORRY; THE BIG DECLOAKMENT IS NEXT EPISODE! OOH!
WHO ARE THE MYSTERIOUS USURPERS?
HOW WILL THEY ESCAPE THE IMPENETRABLE [HAH NO SUCH THING] CELL?
FIND OUT NEXT TIME ON
INUBUYAKASHA!

Episode#1 "The Tale Begins."
Episode#2 "Enter the Token Bloke."
Episode#3 "Stop Silicon Valley, I want to Get Off!."
Episode#4 "Faery Frolics and Fun with a Prophecy."
Episode#5 "The Loco Journeys."
Episode#6 "Cablim gets a Nasty Surprise."
Episode#7 "Beandiana Jones and the Temple of Choom."
Episode#8 "Oddball's Odd Behaviour."
Volume 2: Til Death do us Part
Episode#9 "Happy Birthday, Sweet Fifteen."
Episode#10 "The Sprout Sense."
Episode#11 "Four Funerals and another Funeral.
Episode#12 "Misty Water Colour Spirit Realm...."
Episode#13 "Interview with a Vampire Slayer."
Episode#14 "Ra-Ra-Rasputin!"
Volume 3: Space Opera
Episode#15 "Now the Thugs don't Work..."
Episode#16 "Attack of the Killer Tomatoes."
Episode#17 "Lardraptors!"
Episode#18 "Go Folk Yo' Mama!"
Episode#19 "The Platetrix."
Episode#20 "In Space no one can Hear you Order Pizza."
Episode#21 "Deepwater Yak."
Episode#22 "Yak trek."
Episode#23 "Planet of the crepes."
Episode#24 "Dude Where's my Comedy Plot Conventions?."
Volume 4: Unconventional
Episode#25 "A Clockwork Beansprout."
Episode#26 "The Long Awaited Explaination."
Episode#27 "Ten things I hate about 'funny' cartoon crossovers."
Episode#28 "The Plan."
Volume 5: Happy Endings
Episode#29 "We're off to See a Werewolf..."
Episode#30 "The Yak and the Beansprout."
Episode#31 "The fellowship of the Thing."
Episode#32 "The one Where the Cast of Friends do Nothing and the Cast of IBYKS do little more."
Episode#33 "Meet your Yak."
Episode#34 "The Laughing Yak."
Episode#35 "Lord of the Thing(s)."
Episode#36 "Extra Extra Special with Magic, Cheese and Tesco."
Episode#37 "Faeries and Werewolves and Yaks, oh My!."
Episode#38 "IBYKS The animated feature film."
Episode#39 "The return of the Parents of the Children."
Episode#40 "Events Concluding Those which Preceeded."
Episode#41 "The Chips of WRATH!."
Episode#42 "In which Cabbage has Angst."
Episode#43 "Heaven is a Shoeshop."
Episode#44 "The Importance of being Soulless."
Episode#45 "Vinyl fantasy."
Volume 6: Killing Time
Episode#46 "Where is My Happy Ending...?"
Episode#47 "The Books of Faerie."
Episode#48 "Back to the Future from the Past..."
Episode#49 "The Time and Space of the Old Dude with the 'tache."
Episode#50 "Sprout, Flib, Yakky & J's Excellent Adventure."
Episode#51 "The Nerds The Nerds!"
Episode#52 "The Land of Reality."
Episode#53 "Ordinary (boring) World."
Episode#54 "Smoke and Mirrors."
Episode#55 "Some things we hate about Clones."
Episode#56 "I've got no Idea what you did Last Summer..."
Episode#57 "The Shoe Towers."
Episode#58 "Pizza is a dish best Served Cold."
Episode#59 "Sprout's Masked Replica."
Episode#60 "Curiouser and Curiouser..."
Episode#61 "Not another Season Finale?."
Volume 7: Intertextuality
pisode#62 "Faerietale."
Episode#63 "When Narrative Functions Turn Bad..."
Episode#64 "Jack, the Beanstalk, The Beauty, The Beast, The Witch, The Wardrobe and Will."
Episode#65 "Its a Good Li(f)e."
Episode#66 "The one with Four Titles..."
Episode#67 "The B Team."
Episode#68 "Narnia Has Nothing on this..."
Episode#69 "Clash of the Heroines."
Episode#70 "To Infinity and Beyond."
Episode#71 "The Thingwraith."
Episode#72 "Ghostmom."
Episode#73 "And all that Black Widow Crap Jazz."
Episode#74 "I've got a theory..."
Episode#75 "Magical Girl- Pretty Scary."
Episode#76 "Wheels within Wheels within Wheels- ARGH!"
Episode#77 "J's Story."
Episode#78 "Irrevocably Broken."
Volume 8: Loose Ends
Episode#79 "Lots of things Begin With Dee."
Episode#80 "Adventures in Slumberland."
Episode#81 "The One with the Revelation."
Episode#82 "Artificial Life Sucks.com."
Episode#83 "Saving Beansprout's Brain."
Episode#84 "The Road is Folking Hard..."
Episode#85 "The One with Gender Issues."
Episode#86 "Disneyland."
Episode#87 "(DEMON)Llama Llama Llama..."
Episode#88 "Perspective."
Episode#89 "Me, Myself and Ai."
Episode#90 "Wedding Cake or Death."
Episode#91 "Real Life.or Pizza, With Extra Cheese."
Extras
Episode#92 "Prologue in Manga Form."
Episode#93 "Curtain Opens."
Episode#94 "Trailer for series six."
Episode#95 "A nepalese Werewolf in London."(Flashback story, prelude to series eight)
Episode#96 "Fantasy Life Sucks."
Episode#97 "Credits Roll."
Episode#98 "IBYKS Companion (Part 1)."
Episode#99 "IBYKS Companion (Part 2)."
Episode#100 "IBYKS Companion (Part 3)."