Volume 1: a Foolish Faerietale
Episode #89 "Me, Myself and Ai. [watch me pun with my limited Japanese] By Ally

FEY reappeared in a swirl of binary, much like the opening credits of the matrix, because like Flib, she had a sense of style and impressive entrances.
"Some of the more obvious inconsistencies have been removed. I suggest we now attempt to-"
"-Sort out WILL?" said Flibbage. "I thought so too. But we need to work out how seeing as he doesn't exist in-"
"-The real world? No. But luckily-"
"You have a plan?"
"Oh. Dear. God." Said Dee.
"Can't keep up?" asked Beansprout wryly.
Yakky (as usual) was confused. "Why are they talking like that?"
FEY looked at him as if he just asked her what number comes after two. "My processor is modelled on her brain patterns."
"Well why don't YAK(ky) and I finish each other's sentences then?"
Everyone looked around at each other and didn't say anything.
"We've really got to get these inconsistencies sorted…" Flib commented.[ I frikkin' LOVE metafiction!]
"Author error, can't do anything about it." Said FEY.[It's in de past! to quote Rafiki the wise monkey]
"So how are we gonna kick WILL's ass, dudes?" asked Bobjim.
"WILL has taken corporeal form in the past," said FEY, "we can only assume that this would be his most vunerable state as he is fully immersed in the narrative. I can attempt to flush WILL out of the ether [as in Ethernet]-and…"
"…Nuke the bastard till he glows?" asked Beansprout.
"And you don't even have an A.I"
"Shut up, Yakky."
FEY pointed and a square portal opened up in the air revealing a very impractical castle.
"Not the Faerie Realm again," muttered Dee.
"No! its- DISNEYLAND!!!"
"Shut UP, Yakky."
"Actually I think he's right," said J, peering through the portal, "But why Disneyland?"
FEY explained. "Disneyland has just become the HQ of a new organization seeking world domination. It's a nexus for the chaos that seems to be spreading through this version of the universe. It's certain that WILL will manifest there."
"That makes very little sense to me, but okay."
"We might as well take that photo while we're there," said Bobjim, randomly producing a Polaroid camera.
"Yes," said FEY. "That is consistent."
"Can't it wait?" said Flib, testily.
"No, the photo must be taken on arrival, so you seem like normal tourists."
"I have wings! Yakky has ears! On his head! How are we supposed to look like normal tourists?"
"Don't worry, this is Disneyland we're talking about."
"Well lets get this pointless task out the way," muttered Dee, and stepped through the portal. J, then Yakky and Bobjim followed..
Flib glanced at Beansprout. "Well, this is it."
"This is always 'it', until the next 'it' shows up."
"True. What about 'Here we go again'? Are you ready?"
"When have I ever not been ready to kick something into tiny pieces?"
"Lets go."
"And lets thank the gods we don't have a cheesy catchphrase."
They walked towards the portal.
"Wait for a second, you two," said FEY.
* * *
The other four arrived outside some pastel pink gates and turnstiles. Dee sniffed the air.
"Whats that?" she said.
"Look, it's not our fault," said J. "The writers never write about showers."
"Pardon?"
"Dude," said Bobjim, who, as a half-elf, was the only one who understood what he was talking about, "what do the writers have against showers?"
"I bet they just never thought of it." J answered looking crossly at where he thought the camera man might be standing if there was in fact a camera, and this was not prose.
"Shut up, shut up! It's not any of you!" Dee snapped, "It's something small… fluffy…edible… in vast quantities…" with a growl she vaulted over the turnstile and disappeared into Disneyland like a yip-yip dog after mice.[because the average rat could eat a yip-yip dog].
The boys watched her go.
"Beansprout'll be sorry she missed that," Yakky commented, "Talking of which, where are they?"
"Don't know, dude. Hey, you don't ever crave small, fluffy animals for breakfast, do you?"
"Nah, me and my werewolf side aren't particularly in touch with each other. I mean apart from the ears and pointy teeth, I just get really pissy around the full moon. And I do eat a lot of steak… and weird stuff like silver brings me out in a rash, but otherwise-"
"We really don't care."
"Oh."
At that point Beansprout and Flibbage appeared looking tense.
"What kept you, Dudes?"
"Nothing! Shut up! We've got things to do and a ten-minute window in which to do them!"
"Hang on… okay, Smile!" said Bobjim.
And so, the time travelling Polaroid was taken.
Flibbage conjured up a piece of rare steak that brought Dee to heel, and they set off into the amusement park.
"Folk!" exclaimed Flib, pausing in the turnstile as she crossed the threshold of Disneyland (and causing everyone behind her to get stuck).
"What?"
"Hostile World Domination Organization? They're Faeries!"
* * *
Fey was dividing her consciousness down phonelines and copying surveillance programs into databases in a Hex-like way [sci-fi tale written by a girl called Rhiannon Lassister. Only seventeen when first published, great role model for Ally] when she picked up on Flibbage's voice.
"FEY, change of plan. You're gonna have to turn that ten minutes into half an hour."
"Organics," muttered FEY under her breath, and began restructuring the electronic medium where The Story, was being kept.
* * *
"Right Face!" Flelen commanded.
The Ninja hamsters milled around aimlessly.
"AAAAND LEFT!"
(squeak squeak squeak…)
"They're so well trained," Flelen wiped a tear from her eye. "So Fjen, how's your battle plan going?"
"First we send the hamsters after George-Bush-Fucking-Twat, and then we get compromising photos of Tony Blair with one of the baby hamsters, then we deploy hamster SWAT teams to every Starbucks, in order to catch out the Big Pricks…
"Maybe we should leave them to it…" whispered Yakky from behind the gift stand, where our intrepid heroes were hiding out.
"There's no way I'm letting a minion take out George Bush," said Flibbage firmly, "his ass is mine."
"Maybe you should go have a private word with them, its not like they can hurt you," said Beansprout to her.
"The hamsters will chew her feet off before she can get close!"
"Not if we create a diversion…"
"Not if I kill all the hamsters," said Dee, licking her lips.
Flibbage and Beansprout, looked at each other, then at Dee.
"I like the sound of that plan."
"Thank you."
"We're never going to forgive you for it."
"Oh, I know."
* * *
Cabbage sat on her throne and leaned back, chuckling in an evil dictator style manner.
"Sho, Cabbage," slurred Red as she fell over, "Does thish mean you're Queen again?"
"Damn Folking straight."
"I thought you'd be like Queen Dowager, or shomething…" said Red from the floor.
"As if."
"So, if you were the Late Queen and, and now you're not, is Flib the Early Queen?"
"Shuddup, that's just stupid."
Red shrugged and waved at a passing male faery, "Heeeeeey! You're cute!"
* * *
"So whats our diversion gonna be?" Yakky said, creeping after Beansprout as she crept round the Pirates of the Carribean ride.[Is it a rollercoaster? Well she wasn't creeping round Johnny and Orlando, much as she'd like to]
"I'm just trying to think of one," said Beansprout prying the front of a control panel off and inspecting the mechanism.
Yakky put his hands in his pockets and looked around awkwardly. "Y'know, Sprout, I think we need to talk…."
"Uh-huh," said Beansprout distractedly, pulling out wires and reconnecting them.
"I mean, I've been thinking a lot, what with all the stuff with Dee, and you nearly marrying J, and me being forced to marry Flib for a while, and just about everything really…"
"That's nice…Folking short-circuited health-hazard piece of machinery…"
"And I was just thinking… well, there have been so many things we couldn't be sure of… and… um… well…"
Beansprout's head had all but disappeared amongst the wires, but Yakky could still see her pigtails and hear muffled curses. He took this as having her undivided attention.
"So I was wondering if-"
There was a loud sound of metal groaning and the ride began to move. The soundtrack to Pirates of the Caribbean began to echo back and forth in the otherwise quiet park.[I know the ride doesn't have this, because it was around before the film, but it's for effect.][I'm sure it has piratey music of some description]
Beansprout emerged from the machinery, smudged with engine oil. "Sorry, you were saying?"
* * *
"Some of you may be afraid," Flelen thundered to the hamsters, "But remember! You are not here to die for your spinny wheels and warm sawdust, No! You are here to make the other bastards die for theirs! I believe- ooh, a rollercoaster!" and she and Flelen took off towards the ride. As they flew past the impractical castle, two large hooks shot out of a window, and hauled them in.
The Flainsworth Imps looked up to see a smiling Flibbage, and a strange elf they didn't know.
"A word?" said Flibbage cheerily.
* * *
J and Dee were still crouched behind the gift shop. J was holding a giant gun [Where does he keep them? Ack! Everything you didn't want to know about IBYKS and were too disgusted to ask][I can only hope its some variation on L-space]. Dee was drooling.
"Wait for the diversion, Dee." J warned her.
"Fuck the diversion! I'm HUNGRY!"
"Damn straight," muttered J to himself.
"What?" said Dee flicking an ear in his direction.
"Oh! Sorry… I thought you said 'I'm hot.'
Dee looked at him with much the same expression she'd been eyeing the hamsters with.
"Well you are!"
"Do you not have that little bit of your brain that prevents you saying stupid things?"
"Nope."
"Thought not," muttered Dee, then pricked up her ears as the ride ground into life. "There's our diversion!"
"It might not be-"
"THERE'S THE DIVERSION!"
"…okay."
Dee pounced into the masses of hamsters with a roar, and started cutting swathes through them with her claws. Caught up in the moment J stepped out and began firing rounds into the hamsters as they charged.
"DAMN THE MAN! SAVE THE TORPEDOES!"
"Eh?" said Dee, pausing, and was immediately buried under a wave of hamsters.
"DEE!" J yelled and opened fire, shreds of hamsters went everywhere. He ran over and helped her to her feet.
"Did you just shoot at me with your eyes closed!?"
"No!"
"But you still SHOT AT ME!"
"Well yeah, but it's not like I had silver bullets or anything!"
Dee looked at him as if she was about to slap him. Then she smiled and squeezed his shoulder.
"Thanks J."
"Squeak?" interrupted a nearby hamster.
As one they turned to face it.
"Bring it on, Fluffy."[Do you remember my hamster Scruffy? Now she was a ninja. Actually no, she was just a psychopath]
* * *
"Now," said Flibbage, "As you Queen, I command you to stop trying to dominate the world and go back to Faery. I mean, come on! It's the mortal realm, it smells all funny."
"Tis true," said Fjen, "Lets go back to the Realm, Flelen."
"Actually ," said Flelen, "I'm more of a Demon Imp than a Faerie one these days. So… screw you."
[Dammit, Fjen should have swallowed that Shikon shard, they've just said things the other would say in real life.]

"Flelen!" hissed Fjen, "That's the Queen! She'll kick our asses!"
"Queen eh?" said Flelen, walking over to Flibbage. "Really?"
"Don't push it, Flelen," said Flibbage.
Typically, Flelen pushed her. Flib fell off her shoes and landed on the floor with a painful sounding thump.
"Ow!"
Bobjim and Fjenny stared. "Not good, dudette," whispered Bobjim to Flib.
"But you can't hurt the queen!" exclaimed Fjen, "It just isn't possible!"
Flelen looked on thoughtfully as the Shikon-no-tama did it's usual second wave of transformation and she grew about three feet taller. She tapped her chin with newly sharpened claws.
"If I can hurt her…" she picked up Flibbage by the wings.
"Then she can't be Queen anymore."
* * *
Beansprout stared at Yakky.
"WHAT!?"
"Um-"
"WHAT!?!"
"Listen-"
"I don't believe this!" Yelled Sprout, "I mean, why now!?"
"Beansprout-"
"How can you say something like that to me?"
Yakky didn't even bother trying to reply.
Beansprout turned around and began to walk away, "I can't believe this…"
"Beansprout!"
"Folk off."
He watched her go, leaned against the wall and slid to the ground.
"Shit. Shit, shit SHIT!"
"That's right, Fred!" said a voice next to him.

"Illumina!" Flibbage yelled, and a fireball exploded in Flelen's facing causing her to drop her.
"Controversial," Fjen commented.
"I'm the Queen dammit!" aid Flib despite all evidence to the contrary, "Go home!"
"But we like it, here." Fjenny and Flelen dropped into fighting stances, and launched forward in one of their deadly tandem attacks."
"Jenga!" yelled a voice, and the imps toppled over.
Flibbage looked over her shoulder, Bobjim grinned. "More than just a pretty face, dudette."
"As if. Now DUCK!" Flib yelled as Flelen leaped again.
Bobjim hit the floor and Flib held up her hands:
"Some are born great, as for you,
I'm afraid this isn't true.
Be released from borrowed charms,
And-"

"Flib!" wailed a voice. There was a clatter of footsteps up the impractical stairs and Beansprout tumbled intro the room.
"Kind of busy right now, Sprout." Said Flibbage trying to hold onto the unfinished spell, which was glowing dangerously and trying to bounce out of her hands.
"But I don't know what to do!"
"You're a clever girl, can't you just do something clever?" Flibbage glanced at the Flainsworth's, who, luckily seemed just as interested in Beansprout as anything else.
"I can't! Not when Yakky's being so Goddamn stupid!"
Flibbage groaned and let the spell go, "What's wrong this time?"
"Well, he started saying all this stuff about Dee, and how I nearly married J, and how you had to marry him, to keep him from getting hurt…"
Beansprout paused, pale and wide eyed. She looked like she was fighting back tears.
"Oh Folk… Don't tell me he gave up on you?"
"No!" wailed Beansprout. "The stupid Folking bastard PROPOSED!"
GASP!
ONLY TWO EPISODES LEFT!
HOW WILL THESE INTRUGING EVENTS UNFOLD?
FIND OUT NEXT TIME, IN THE PENULTIMATE EPISODE OF
INUBUYAKASHA!

STUFF THAT DIDN'T FEATURE IN THIS EPISODE:
RED BEING ASKED OUT IN MIME BY A MAN WHO COULD NEITHER SPEAK NOR UNDERSTAND ENGLISH.
CABBAGE'S FEAR OF SCARY COSPLAYERS.
HEATHCLIFFE DOING ANYTHING, FOR OBVIOUS REASONS.
BUSH BOMBING LEGOLAND, BECAUSE HIS INTELLIGENCE WAS WRONG (OR IN HIS CASE, NON-EXISTENT).
ANYTHING ABOUT THE FAIR.
ANYTHING ABOUT FISH.
GUEST APPEARANCES BY BLOOM AND DEPP.
YAKKY AND J TAKING A SHOWER... NOT TOGETHER.

Episode#1 "The Tale Begins."
Episode#2 "Enter the Token Bloke."
Episode#3 "Stop Silicon Valley, I want to Get Off!."
Episode#4 "Faery Frolics and Fun with a Prophecy."
Episode#5 "The Loco Journeys."
Episode#6 "Cablim gets a Nasty Surprise."
Episode#7 "Beandiana Jones and the Temple of Choom."
Episode#8 "Oddball's Odd Behaviour."
Volume 2: Til Death do us Part
Episode#9 "Happy Birthday, Sweet Fifteen."
Episode#10 "The Sprout Sense."
Episode#11 "Four Funerals and another Funeral.
Episode#12 "Misty Water Colour Spirit Realm...."
Episode#13 "Interview with a Vampire Slayer."
Episode#14 "Ra-Ra-Rasputin!"
Volume 3: Space Opera
Episode#15 "Now the Thugs don't Work..."
Episode#16 "Attack of the Killer Tomatoes."
Episode#17 "Lardraptors!"
Episode#18 "Go Folk Yo' Mama!"
Episode#19 "The Platetrix."
Episode#20 "In Space no one can Hear you Order Pizza."
Episode#21 "Deepwater Yak."
Episode#22 "Yak trek."
Episode#23 "Planet of the crepes."
Episode#24 "Dude Where's my Comedy Plot Conventions?."
Volume 4: Unconventional
Episode#25 "A Clockwork Beansprout."
Episode#26 "The Long Awaited Explaination."
Episode#27 "Ten things I hate about 'funny' cartoon crossovers."
Episode#28 "The Plan."
Volume 5: Happy Endings
Episode#29 "We're off to See a Werewolf..."
Episode#30 "The Yak and the Beansprout."
Episode#31 "The fellowship of the Thing."
Episode#32 "The one Where the Cast of Friends do Nothing and the Cast of IBYKS do little more."
Episode#33 "Meet your Yak."
Episode#34 "The Laughing Yak."
Episode#35 "Lord of the Thing(s)."
Episode#36 "Extra Extra Special with Magic, Cheese and Tesco."
Episode#37 "Faeries and Werewolves and Yaks, oh My!."
Episode#38 "IBYKS The animated feature film."
Episode#39 "The return of the Parents of the Children."
Episode#40 "Events Concluding Those which Preceeded."
Episode#41 "The Chips of WRATH!."
Episode#42 "In which Cabbage has Angst."
Episode#43 "Heaven is a Shoeshop."
Episode#44 "The Importance of being Soulless."
Episode#45 "Vinyl fantasy."
Volume 6: Killing Time
Episode#46 "Where is My Happy Ending...?"
Episode#47 "The Books of Faerie."
Episode#48 "Back to the Future from the Past..."
Episode#49 "The Time and Space of the Old Dude with the 'tache."
Episode#50 "Sprout, Flib, Yakky & J's Excellent Adventure."
Episode#51 "The Nerds The Nerds!"
Episode#52 "The Land of Reality."
Episode#53 "Ordinary (boring) World."
Episode#54 "Smoke and Mirrors."
Episode#55 "Some things we hate about Clones."
Episode#56 "I've got no Idea what you did Last Summer..."
Episode#57 "The Shoe Towers."
Episode#58 "Pizza is a dish best Served Cold."
Episode#59 "Sprout's Masked Replica."
Episode#60 "Curiouser and Curiouser..."
Episode#61 "Not another Season Finale?."
Volume 7: Intertextuality
pisode#62 "Faerietale."
Episode#63 "When Narrative Functions Turn Bad..."
Episode#64 "Jack, the Beanstalk, The Beauty, The Beast, The Witch, The Wardrobe and Will."
Episode#65 "Its a Good Li(f)e."
Episode#66 "The one with Four Titles..."
Episode#67 "The B Team."
Episode#68 "Narnia Has Nothing on this..."
Episode#69 "Clash of the Heroines."
Episode#70 "To Infinity and Beyond."
Episode#71 "The Thingwraith."
Episode#72 "Ghostmom."
Episode#73 "And all that Black Widow Crap Jazz."
Episode#74 "I've got a theory..."
Episode#75 "Magical Girl- Pretty Scary."
Episode#76 "Wheels within Wheels within Wheels- ARGH!"
Episode#77 "J's Story."
Episode#78 "Irrevocably Broken."
Volume 8: Loose Ends
Episode#79 "Lots of things Begin With Dee."
Episode#80 "Adventures in Slumberland."
Episode#81 "The One with the Revelation."
Episode#82 "Artificial Life Sucks.com."
Episode#83 "Saving Beansprout's Brain."
Episode#84 "The Road is Folking Hard..."
Episode#85 "The One with Gender Issues."
Episode#86 "Disneyland."
Episode#87 "(DEMON)Llama Llama Llama..."
Episode#88 "Perspective."
Episode#89 "Me, Myself and Ai."
Episode#90 "Wedding Cake or Death."
Episode#91 "Real Life.or Pizza, With Extra Cheese."
Extras
Episode#92 "Prologue in Manga Form."
Episode#93 "Curtain Opens."
Episode#94 "Trailer for series six."
Episode#95 "A nepalese Werewolf in London."(Flashback story, prelude to series eight)
Episode#96 "Fantasy Life Sucks."
Episode#97 "Credits Roll."
Episode#98 "IBYKS Companion (Part 1)."
Episode#99 "IBYKS Companion (Part 2)."
Episode#100 "IBYKS Companion (Part 3)."